211: Martini Mayhem
Mike Messeroff spent three decades in hospitality and was JetBlue’s first intern before swapping corporate partnerships for a life of travel and a career behind the bar. A low point in paradise led him to mindfulness, daily meditation, and ultimately leadership coaching for hospitality executives. Today, he’s launching the Self Hospitality Collective, offering bite-sized audio guidance and practical practices for leaders. Susan and Mike talk about meditation, mindfulness, and modern management.
What You'll Learn About:
• JetBlue’s first intern by “accident”? Mike turns a chance aisle chat with the CEO into a career.
• Daydreaming of beach life? Mike says you’ll pack your baggage either way, so do the inner work first.
• Breckenridge paradox: daily skiing + dream town ≠ joy; anxiety became the wake-up call.
• “Happiness is uncaused.” (Yes, that line stops the show—and your doom-scroll.)
• Self Hospitality = treating yourself like the VIP in your lobby: restocked, respected, and not running on fumes.
• Meditation is non-negotiable. Even 3 minutes builds that “magic gap” between trigger and response.
• Gratitude hack: you can’t be stressed and thankful at the same time.
• For the “no-woo” crowd: real-world ROI—lower cortisol, better focus, fewer dish-smashing meltdowns.
• Micro-practices for brutal days: one conscious breath, a three-minute reset, a mindful reminder (“I’m here to solve problems”).
Our Top Three Takeaways:
1. Inner Work Comes Before Outer Change
Mike’s story shows that changing your surroundings, whether by moving to a beach in the Caribbean or skiing daily in Colorado, doesn’t guarantee happiness. Wherever you go, you bring yourself with you. True fulfillment comes from addressing patterns like negative self-talk, stress, or self-medication. External shifts may feel exciting, but without the inner work, they won’t resolve deeper struggles.
2. Self-Hospitality Is Essential for Leaders
Mike’s concept of self hospitality is about treating yourself like your most honored guest. Just as hoteliers go above and beyond for VIPs, leaders should extend that same care inward: practicing consistent meditation (even for just three minutes), cultivating gratitude, setting clear boundaries, and pursuing personal passions. When leaders nurture themselves, they can give from a place of overflow rather than depletion—ultimately benefiting their teams, guests, and organizations.
3. Joy and Happiness Are Our Natural State
Mike emphasizes that happiness is “uncaused," meaning we are born joyful, but stress, fear, and external pressures layer over it. Through mindfulness practices like meditation and gratitude, leaders can reconnect with that natural state and create a “magic gap” between stress and response. This not only prevents burnout but also models healthier, more sustainable leadership in an industry prone to overwork and high stress.
The Carpe Diem Company
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